The Bug Geek

Insects. Doing Science. Other awesome, geeky stuff.

Fall

Fall is here, finally.

I drove home from work yesterday marvelling at the glorious orange and red hues lit up by determined rays of sun bursting out of an otherwise black, rainy fall sky. My neighbour’s soya and corn fields are ready to be harvested. School busses are once again delaying my morning commute to work. We don’t need to mow our lawn as frequently. We enjoyed our first small fire of the season in our woodstove; the small mugsly heat-seeking dog blissfully panted her fool head off three inches from the flames. I’ve traded in my much-loved flip flops for warmer sneakers and I’m cozying up in flannel pjs in the evening.

It’s my favourite season; a time of great beauty, many homey comforts, and change. I’m glad for fall right now; I feel like a new cycle, a new season, is needed in my life.

My last post was a long list of downers. It’s been a very challenging summer. K’s dad, my father-in-law, passed away at the age of 75, from complications due to cancer. His story is probably a whole other post to tell it properly, but suffice it to say his passing was quite fast; thankfully so, but also heartbreakingly so. We all miss him very much. In a completely different league, but still difficult, little Molly is almost definitely gone and work has just about sucked the very last little ounce of joie de vivre out of me.

So it’s time to renew, I think. I think things are starting to get a bit lighter, but that there’s still a bit of a crust that needs to be shaken off me… Some good things are happening, which is helping.

I had a fairly significant birthday this year: I turned 30 about 2 weeks ago. K spoiled me rotten (hello, new laptop for school ZOMG). My experience with newly 30-somethings is that they are usually in some state of denial or anger or depression. I can truthfully say that 30 feels like a really good fit for me; I’m actually kind of glad for it. It feels like a turning point, a milestone, a time for change (did I mention that I feel like I need change? ‘Cause yeah, I need it). As much as a part of me fears that I am trying to claw back my 20’s (um, yeah, going back to vis-a-vis the “back to school” thing) I feel like I’m making a very adult decision about my career path. I’ve decided that “good enough” really isn’t, and that I need a career I feel passionate about in order to be fulfilled. And gosh darn it, I deserve to be fulfilled (extra props and brownie points for my amazing wife who is willing to put up with me being a student, AGAIN, and changing jobs, AGAIN, and having a very unpredictable schedule, AGAIN). I need this to be happy, so I’m doing it. So there.

On that note, I found out I’m meeting my future advisor in person next week to talk more about the dreamy-cool research project I’ll be working on. He wants me to meet his students and see his lab up and running and participate in a seminar group (*does little happy dance of academe-induced geekiness*). All I’m waiting for now is the official “yes” letter from the University. Then I can exhale.

Anyhoo, lots more going on but that’s all I have in me for today.

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2 responses to “Fall

  1. R October 1, 2009 at 8:23 AM

    You know it's about time for an update! I've missed the hell out of you! Although I am sadden to hear of your FIL's passing. Much love and sympathy to you, Kim, and her family. It's tough and lung cancer is a bitch because it's normally so fast.

    Yay for change, fall, turning 30, and new laptops!! I think I actually had a mini mid-life crisis this year also. Lots of re-evaluating things, stepping back and observing, and making changes. It's a good thing.

    I admire you so much, C, for the courage it takes to go back to school. I think you know without a doubt it's the right decision for you and I'm so excited you're almost there! I can't wait to hear about your experiences.

    I am hoping to make an appointment with an adviser at my local technical college next week. I have an AS in IT but I've forgotten so much and I'd like to see what will transfer and how much aid I can receive. I'm thinking of going for a BA and focusing on programming. But I'm scared shitless, to be honest. It will be a lot on my plate to work and go to school but in the end I think it will be totally worth it.

    Now don't fade into the mist, you gotta keep a girl updated on what's going on with you. I miss our little group. And I think there is so much going on with each of us right now. Maybe I'll send a little update out today if I get a moment and see if anyone wants to respond, lol. Much love to you, girlie!

  2. JML October 1, 2009 at 12:53 PM

    Crystal!

    Glad to hear from you. I guess this means I have to try and update my blog now as well. sigh…

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